Saturday, October 25, 2008

Tidbits of Hot Scoops!

Dear Blob!
3 pages into today's LA Times hurled my into my Blogging Chair to share the ridiculousness of this civilization, so celebrated by olden-days, anti-tribal Missionaries.

TIDBIT #1: The far-right, white supremecist leader of Austria, who died in a recent car crash, was eulogized by his "protege", who tearfully called the dead supremicist "The Love Of My Life" and hinted at their gay love affair.

TIDBIT #2: An article about the depressed wives of Wall Street workers, who's salaries have fallen from $400,000 a year to a mere $200,00 a year and OMG, what are these weepy wives going to do now?! Their plans are all-in-a-tiddle and now they'll be forced to go without their maids, 3rd vacation homes and car service!

And the best for last:
TIDBIT #3: John McCain's brother, Joe McCain, called 911 to complain about traffic.

If everyone did Anusara yoga and drove a stick shift, the world would be a better place.
Love The Ukulady
PS: To The Downfall of Evil and May Fearlessness Prevail! (the good kind of fearlessness, not like jumping off cliffs.)

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Palin's Pricey Panty Spree!

Dear Blob,
I have staved off Election Fever Ranting, due to being overwhelmed by the total Bullshit and Hypocrisy of it all, however, this morning I became fed up, upon reading the Republicans spent over $150, 000 in the past month, to clothe Sarah Palin and her family. It's understandable that the potential leader of the most pompous nation should be clad in platinum corsets, probably designed by the gay men, who's weddings Sarah opposes. However Sarah, if you're going to shop like Gengi Bluth, of Arrested Development, the best TV show in the world (see Ode to Arrested Development.mp3 on stop gushing about your Wal Mart hockey momness! Wal Mart Hockey moms do not shop at Neimans and nor do they clad their retarded infants in $92 rompers. If you're going to Katie Holmes it up, Sarah, embrace it! Admit you are thrilled to buy Piper individual silken children's panties, rather than the economical 3-packs from Target. Admit Bristol's teen maternity smock is hand-made by Paris Hilton's theoretcial BFF.

Hypocrisy is rampant. Just yesterday I vocally yearned to be a lesbian in order to get the people to give me my own show. Yet this morning, I wished for my manpanion to kick it Sunday Worship style (see Sunday Worship on myspace Ukulady homepage) with me.

In other news, please vote NO on H'Eight! The California economy & my wedding-photographer sister cannot afford to lose the potential of unthrifty gay couples throwing The Best Party Ever! I want to go to fabulous gay weddings!
Love The Ukulady
ps: I voted absentee!

Friday, October 17, 2008

Hulk Hogan & Tiffany! Finally Together!

Dear Blob,
There are few things that will rouse a sick person from his sickbed. Hulk Hogan's new celebrity wrestling show has proven to be one of them. My sick manpanion HAD to get up and show me the website for the Hulk's new series and upon perusal, it is definitely CoGo (Comedy Gold!). Finally Todd Bridges of Different Strokes is on break from his career as a pastor! Finally and Frank Stallone and Tiffany will clad their has-been physiques in wrestling unitards and display their physical prowess! Along with a variety of people who think they are celebrities, such as former reality television stars, Dennis Rodman and Screech from Saved by the Bell, join Hulk Hogan in an extravaganza of spangled bikini-suits, sweat and weiner-pouches. Apparently men and women will wrestle each other and Tiffany has gained some weight in the past 20 years. Of course, reality-TV whore, Danny Bonaduce, joins the all-star cast and viewers can join-in the magic tomorrow!
Love The Ukulady
ps: I'm totally sick of the election, have learned to drive a stick-shift and am bored by Brittney's healing and comeback.
pps: Manpanion just informed me that Danny Bonaduce, Todd Bridges and Vanilla Ice were on a boxing reality show years ago. How lucky the world is, to have entertainment!
ppps: Also, this show is on the Country Music Television channel! WTF? Love it.