UkuAdventures in LA: Fear Propaganda, Velveeta & Seeds!

Dear Blob,
Driving around LA, I'm disgusted by the amount of billboards for new movies and television that base their ad campaigns around Fear. Like whiny Luke Skywalker in the first Star Wars, I feel whiny about Fear Propaganda; "When will Americans realize our society is based on Fear Propaganda?" Whine I in a whiny meep.

When I was on my way to Mexico for 5 weeks, more than 5 friends looked stricken upon learning of my destination and warned me against getting kidnapped. I was surprised that so many well-educated, saavy and seemingly-courageous friends of mine still believe everything the news says. Thanks American News for Meeping up the Mexican Tourism industry! It would be like someone saying to an LA-bound tourist, "Ahh! Careful you don't get shot!" Interestingly, many non-Americans I've met believe that all Americans carry guns.

Videogames about war and fighting, television about murder and crime, films about murder and betrayal, books on sex and vampires; this is what our society is raising new humans on. Since the rise of Monotheism, humans have relied on Fear Propaganda and I find it mind-blowing that Fear Propaganda is still going strong; it's numero uno! Fear is Little Miss Pretty Princess, Gold Medal Winner, Valedictorian!

The Hollywood movie billboards are a sad joke on humanity. Millions of dollars wasted on a couple hours of chip-eating-inducing escapsim about either fat stoners or sexy murder. The Hollywood moguls would seemingly rather buy another vacation house than stand up to their peers and say, "Meep this! I'm going to make a 100 million dollar film about kindness!" Bummer for the masses who don't have the privilege of a private school education which encouraged me to be a critical thinker and question, rather than fill-in-the-SAT-bubbles and remain a frightened chip-eating sheep. I'm a chip-eating questioner.

The news frightens people of the wrong things. A tiny part of Mexico is dangerous, not the entire country. What is dangerous is the Fukushima nuclear waste spreading throughout the globe. The news considers Jessica Simpson's fat more important than radioactive poisoning, which is Everywhere. Apparently the Fear Propaganda leaders prefer to keep humans scared of each other and mind-broadening world-travel.

The pioneers were told by pioneer newspapers that the Indians were bloodthirsty, so they set off into Indian Territory terrified and racist. Genocide comes from Fear Propaganda.

I'm not scared of international travel or Muslims or checking out Watts Towers in Watts. I'm not scared of people; I'm scared of what the media doesn't tell us: that there is nuclear waste and toxic poison seeping into every corner of planet earth.

I'm scared my years in LA will compromise my health because after all, Readers, LA is a Nuclear Wasteland. How do we get the word out that a Nuclear Meltdown Larger than Three Mile Island happened here in Los Angeles and has never been cleaned up? Does anyone care? Attention San Fernando Valley Dwellers: You are living amidst Nuclear Waste! Don't let your kids play in the dirt outside! Seriously. That's something to be scared of, not taking a trip across borders.

Because of the invention of Money, humans continue to foster racism and xenophobia. Poor humans; too stupid to realize positive thinking is the best choice, until some idiotic book like The Secret comes along, the saavy authors making billions off Human Insecurity.

In other news, how can Velveeta possibly be cheese? I was nibbling leftover Velveeta, which some non-hippie-raised hippie brought over and a droplet fell on my lap. I peeled it off and not a trace remained; it was like plastic. The Lad looked up Velveeta ingredients and apparently it is not technically plastic; however, any food that peels off fabric without leaving a mark can't actually be food.

Love The Ukulady

ps: I planted seeds of basil and artisan salad spring mix a week ago and little green sproutlets are shooting up! Its' so rewarding! Everyone should plant seeds; it feels so fantastic! It should be a requirement in school: gardening from seeds!

UkuAdventures in LA: Beach Picnic & The Nuclear Meltdown of LA

PHOTOS: My Mom, SF Bellydancer, circa 1962, Ukulad!


Dear Blob,
Being a Date-Night Enthusiast and the seeming-literary-romanticness of night-beach-picnicking, The Ukulad and I ventured through the summer-hordes of sexy-outfit-clad Friday-Night-Beach-bar humans to our neighborhood beach, Venice Beach. We were hoping to catch sunset, but unlike Mexico's 8:30-9pm Sunset, LA sun goes down by 8pm.

We nibbled on a C-themed dinner, chicken, chips, carrots & cookies, discussing the virtues of panko and watching the insane twighlight-surfers and then it got cold. An evening beach-picnic is a much more theoretically-pleasing Date-Night than real life, which is cold, seagully & requires constant sand-in-snack vigilance.

We saw the LAPD in action, driving up the pier, through the freezing-tank-topped-tourists, to arrest a be-hoodied figure. The cops are out in droves in Venice, on bike, in car, on foot and helicopter, as well as beach-driving lifeguards in SUV's; The Urban Beach.

Venice Beach is a fabulous seashellery, with tons of interesting treasures washing up in the mornings and later evenings, with the tides. It's a great swimming beach when the toxin-levels are low, but always shower off the potential toxic-waste afterward.

My mom, who grew up in LA in the 1940's and 50's, remembers riding the Red Cars as a child, down to the beach with her little brother. Kids could take the trolley cars alone, play and swim all day safely; a sense of community-safety with everyone watching out for the children, abounded.

In the '50's my mom's family moved from Mar Vista to Grenada Hills, in the San Fernando Valley. She went to high school with Richie Valens of La Bamba fame, roller-skating with him and Donna. In 1959 there was a Nuclear Meltdown larger than Three Mile Island at Rocketdyne in Simi Valley/Northridge. It was never reported, never spoken of and has never been cleaned up.

My mom suffers from chronic, odd illnesses and when I tell Angelenos, particularly Valley-Dwellers, about the Nuclear Meltdown, they rarely are interested. Who wants to know they are living on a toxic-waste dump? The past 10 years has been a time of Truth-Uncovering and my aunt is a cleanup-activist. The activists pour endless energy, time and their limited money into fighting The Giant Evil Corporation, who just overthrew a court-ordered cleanup.

I hold a consta-invisible balance-scale of Lala Living; one side of the scale holds a deep love of LA's history, culture & industry, the other side is a deep aversion to the enormous cons of nuclear waste, vapid-humanity & overall-difficulty-of-simple-chores, like going to the bank.

In other news, today is a Cultural-History-Fun-Outing day to Little Tokyo where the Ukulad is playing a music show with Mista Cookie Jar! Good times to come!

Love The Ukulady

ps: Apparently Fava Beans cleanse soil of toxins. Everyone in the Valley should plant Fava Beans.

pps: Lad is holding Mini-Oreos because they were on-sale, not because we are frequent-Oreo cookie eaters; in fact, it was my first time eating a Mini-Oreo! Very dangerous.