BREAKING NEWS: Mitch Stein Files Discrimination Lawsuit!

CARTOON BEARS! By Will Guy of GoopyMart.com For My Bear-BFF, Mitch Stein!

Dear Blob,
Breaking News! Fired-For-Being-Gay BFF, Mitch Stein, filed his lawsuit against homophobic Charter Oak High School of LA County, today! Read all about it here!

While fighting a lawsuit is totally sucky, it's, unfortunately necessary in this ridiculous civilization we have been born into. Disappointingly, Humans have complicated every aspect of daily life by inventing dozens of ways to simplify daily life, which actually has unsimplified life.

The hot scoop from the plumply kissable lips of Mitch Stein is that he truly did not want to file a lawsuit. He wanted Unicorn Magic to happen (don't we all!). However, Charter Oak High School does not believe in either Unicorn Magic, Sit-Down Communication or Equal Rights for All.

The hypocrites (Christian Right) make me feel throat-barfy throwing around sentences like "We are protecting the Children" and other drivel. The question is Why is Mitch's daughter, Devynn, a second-class citizen? Why can't Devynn's dad be a coach like the straight parents of her pals?

Essentially the Christian Right is saying Gays and Lesbians are not Equal Human Beings. How can we be in 2012 and still have small-minded idiots running the world? How can any human with a brain actually believe in the old-bible God? Particularly a God who Hates the Peeps who throw the Best Parties, look the cutest and create almost-All of the Entertainment of Planet Earth?

Why are Bible-Thumpers so obsessed with what other adults are doing in the bedroom? I, personally, am obsessed with the Donner Party and Pioneers. This is a healthy obsession...making maple syrup from sap, covered wagons and cannibalism; Evangelical's obsession over cooters, booty and weiners is un-evolved. My advice to the Evangelicals is Get a New Obsession (not shopping). Try gardening! UFO research! Crafting Felt Owls out of used sweaters!

Go Mitch Stein and may we all Raise a Glass To The Downfall of Evil!

Love The Ukulady
ps: Aside from being lawsuit-filing upset, Mitch is also bummed about the unflattering photo chosen by the Glendora Patch. He does look...puffy, in the photo. Friendsies, since that fatty-photo moment, Mitch has lost over 40 pounds with exercise and eating well! Girl, you are Fierce! Bring it on!
pps: How awesome is the word Drivel? Love it!

Kim Jong Il is Dead: My Most Surreal Hollywood Moment

Dear Blob,
Perhaps my most surreal Hollywood moment came last night at a holiday party, themed Christmas Island, complete with a tiki man-hut topped by a giant jack-o-lantern-like Santa who spewed soapy fake snow out his triangle eyes and a clam-shell punch fountain.

I and Fired-for-being-Gay-BFF, Mitch (See Blogs from October for the scoop), nibbling on peppermint bark, ham and mashed potatoes, found ourselves seated around an outside fire with gay comedy icon, Bruce Villanch, who I primarily associate with the Muppets. We discussed cameltoe vs. mooseknuckle, the marketability of the new Muppet movie and Atlantis cruises, when Bruce, glanced at his computer phone and casually announced, "Kim Jong Il is Dead." Then Triangle-Eye Santa started up again and it snowed in Gay Hollywood; it was shocking.

My favorite dictator is dead! First Mallomar G, Libya's marshmallow douchebag and now Kimmy, his beige jumpsuits and pouffy hair! Who can I make fun of now? Speaker of the House Boner, upsets me too much. Dictators need to be a healthy distance from me and not affect my daily life, like Boner and his evil-robot/crybaby activities, who would be a dictator if he had the opportunity.

Bruce Villanch informing me of Kim Jong Il's demise amongst the backdrop of snowy gay winter-wonderland, tops my old Most Surreal Hollywood Moment, which took place in an intimate recording studio setting, sharing licorice whips with with Alice Cooper.

Love The Ukulady

ps: Fired-For-Being-Gay, BFF, Mitch Stein, will be filing his discrimination lawsuit against Charter Oak High School very soon! Stay tuned for the scoop!

pps: I hope the North Koreans are secretly partying and get to go free! Poor slaves.

ppps: Could the deaths of 2 Dictators be the start of the 2012 consciousness shift?

Fired-For-Being-Gay, BFF, Mitch Stein, Speaks Out!

Dear Blob,
Fired-For-Being-Gay BFF, Mitch Stein, speaks about homophobia, discrimination & honesty at Citrus Community College:



Love The Ukulady
ps: Sound quality gets much better about 30 seconds in....

The Ukulady Business Traveler: Football Jerseys Dough Tubes

Dear Blob,
I'm, currently a business traveler, living in the Meepity Meep in San Meep, CA, for the next 3 weeks. My job: Fabulous-People Detective. I search for Fabulous San Meepians willing to be on-camera discussing their experience in car-commerce. Not necessarily Fabulous gay, but Fabulous, as in you definitely want to invite this person to your next dinner party. Hotel living is full of pros and cons.

The best part is my personal maid, Meepia, who cleans my room everyday. Worst is the medley of awful music piped into every public space; so while it's awesome to have a pool and hot tub, I have to contend with Easy Listening Light Rock.

The UnNamed Hotel is surprisingly busy, the lobby a hive of tourists & business travelers, easy to tell apart from their outfits; either enthusiastic San Meeep!/California! sweatshirts or conservative black suits with periwinkle shirts.

This weekend swarms of seeming-Mid-Western Sports Enthusiasts have taken over the hotel wearing Green Bay Packers garments and drinking heavily at the hotel bar.

The Sports Travelers of both genders favor the same outfit: a bulky football jersey. The lobby gathering of dozens of football-jersey-clad travelers has led to my new discovery: the football jersey is one of the most Unflattering items a woman can wear, particularly the midwesternly-plump female, who still stubbornly sports a semi-mullet/layered-mall-haircut. The footbal-jerseyed women, no matter how thin, look like pillowy dough-tubes and remind me of cheap pork-snacks served with light cheap beer.

Overheard on my way to the free lobby-coffee (by a pasty-sausagey-jersey-clad-mulleted gal): "I need Tylenol & water." Seems the party started when they landed in San Meep.

In other news, business traveling provides a generous per-diem, which has led to sampling more coffee-cake than I've eaten in the past 5 years. Stay tuned as The Ukulady disguises herself as a real person and convinces Fabulous San Meepians to give up their social security numbers in exchange for the potential of making money.

Love The Ukulady

Lindsay Lohan & Mitch Stein Facing Challenges!

Dear Blob
The ongoing saga of Lindsay Lohan and Fired-For-Being-Gay-BFF, Mitch Stein, continue. Both are moving forward with their new careers: Lindsay posing for Playboy and Mitch speaking at Citrus Community College on November 2nd. Lindsay will reveal her hoo-ha and Mitch will reveal the challenges of being an out gay dad. Both Mitch and Lindsay have lawyers working for their rights, both are being presented with new opportunities and are swinging with the punches, playing the card-hand life has dealt them.

Some might argue Lindsay Lohan has dealt her own hand of cards, shoplifting fancy jewels, getting high and being late on-set; but what other life skillz did she learn by being a Hollywood child starlet? Hollywood is a ruthless, dirty business-village full of hubris, greed and narcissism and she was nurtured in the middle of it's filthy, but super-sexy, bosom.

Occasionally one meets a Hollywood mogul working for the Downfall of Evil, but they still always have to please the investors. Earth is a commerce-driven planet and humans need to evolve into love-driven humans.

Apparently this is happening, according to a new book on the decline of violence on Planet Earth! Great News! Keep up the good work, Humans!

Love The Ukulady
ps: Popcorn season is upon us! Bring on the Winter-Snacks!

Celebrate Good Times: The Death of Mallomar Gaddafi!

Dear Blob,
The big news of the morning: Mallomar Gaddafi is dead. Is it appropriate to have a Celebrate Good Times dance-party with Kool and the Gang? It's awkward to celebrate death, but Mallomar Gaddafi's life's work was the opposite of the Downfall of Evil; in fact, his death is part of the Downfall of Evil.

The death of someone as innately douchebaggy as Gaddafi from planet earth is a good thing. I am generally anti-death-penalty, as I usually feel two wrongs don't make a right and executing murderers seems to be murder; however, there are always exceptions, particularly when it comes to a human who has indulged in horrific anti-human acts for 42 years.

Megalomania is so odd and so constant; humankind has always produced Megalomaniacs and our brains don't seem to have evolved enough to avoid the trap of self-grandeur, which leads to megalomania; however, why does megalomania usually lead to murder, rape & other inhuman acts?

Money & Power led Bill Gates to create solutions to worlwide problems; why didn't Money & Power do the same for Mallomar? Perhaps because Mallomar was not a nerdy intellectual, but a savage warrior. Maybe Money & Power do fairly well in the hands of intellectuals, but ridiculously horrific in the hands of the stupid; as displayed in my latest TV obsession, Breaking Bad. I urge all good-TV Enthusiasts to enjoy it on Netflix.

In other news, I would like to be in a band side-project called The Snacks. This desire came from a Snack Fantasy of wanting a theoretical snack in bed at midnight. I didn't want a real snack, just a fantasy snack, an invisible snack. It was so cozy in bed, the perfect cozy-location for a snack, however I didn't want to re-brush my teeth or actually eat anything. Fantasy Snack is also a good band name.

Love The Ukulady

PS: In honor of Mallomar Gaddafi's death, enjoy WHO CAN WE HATE? By the Ukulady

PPS: Celebrating Mallomar Gaddafi's death is the cousin to telling my ER Nurse Friend to "Have Fun" at work, which I did yesterday.

Fired for Posing with Corndog vs. Public Heroin-Use & Tasty Kakes!

Dear Blob,
While Fired-For-Being-Gay BFF, Mitch Stein's pro-bono lawyer gathers the paperwork to serve the Charter Oak High School District for discrimination, more interesting media stories are emerging, like the basil seedlings I planted a few weeks ago.

My basil seedlets, peeking out of the dirt, are covered in weird black-tar-like meep from odd mushroom spores, which have also emerged from the earth, making the usually-tantalizing basil, creepy and disturbing, just like this recent story in the San Gabriel Tribune: Click Here!

The San Gabriel Tribune reports that an Azusa teacher was (merely) placed on leave after posting on Facebook (quote!), "For the next 40 days I will be giving up heroin - in all its forms" as well as celebrating underage drinking in Europe.

Announcing to Facebook that you are Lenting-it-Up with your Heroin use and the school district only Puts you on Leave?! And Mitch was Fired for posing with a Corndog & some Drag Queens? The glaring homophobia shines as bright as sequin glitter-sparkles favored by drag queens, 5 year old girls and pagaent enthusiasts.

The black mushroom tar-substance of the story is thickening! Just like pudding!

Speaking of pudding, I enjoyed my first Philadelphia Tasty Kake yesterday, courtesy of my new favorite HilariousGayComic, Jackie Jones, a Philly native, who also educated us on the Best Philly Steak, found, not in Philly, but in Atlantic City, New Jersey! The Joy of Learning!

There is more exciting pudding-plot thickening going on with Fired-For-Being-Gay BFF, Mitch, but I'm not allowed to blob about it yet.... Stay tuned...

Love The Ukulady

ps: Tasty Kake, peanut butter flavor, was delicious; way better than any Hostess or Little Debbie product.

pps: I just went to the Tasty Kake website and they have a product called Krimpets! Meeep!

Mitch Tears up on NBC, But No Full Tears for the Haters!

View more videos at: http://nbclosangeles.com.

Mitch Sounds Super Thin in Radio Interview!

Dear Blob,
The tables have turned! Fired-For-Being-Gay, BFF, Mitch, has been my manager for several years; however, now that his story is becoming local and hopefully soon, national news, Mitch wants me to be his manager. Ridiculous.

Readers, please click on this meep to listen to an outstanding Radio Interview with Mitch and LA radio personality, Bill Handel!

And click here to read about Mitch on NBC LA!

Apparently, the NBC article hate-party-lover, Jenny Osterkamp, who's vitriolic quote about pulling her kid off the water-polo team because she hates gay people, isn't even a water-polo parent. She's a bit cold-sorey too; not quite the face the Christian Right wants on-camera....

What's the deal with humans loving to hate? The Ukulad was raised a Southern Baptist and knows the old heeb, Jesus's teachings inside and out and tells me that all that dude wanted was for humans to love and care for each other.

As I've blobbed about before, the homosexuals hated in the bible are not our pals in Weho, the Castro, Your Neighborhood and Every Neighborhood on Planet Earth, but the war-mongering humans who pillaged, burned and raped everyone and everything in Egypt, Assyria, Rome, Babylonia and such.

Same idea as Don't Eat Shellfish; these days we have fridges and ice, so shrimp is cool. These days Homosexuals mean the awesome peeps who have the best taste, throw the best parties, get married & raise kids. It's genetic. Poor Michelle Bachman's husband - sooooooo gay! He'd probs love nothing more than to meep it up at Hamburger Mary's with a gaggle of fab drag queens. He probs watches Logo on the sly.

To The Downfall of Evil, indeed.
Love The Ukulady

ps: Mitch sounds really thin in the radio interview!

"You Can't Have My Tears!" Fired-for-Being-Gay Mitch shouts!

Dear Blob,
I was going to wake up early and listen to formerly Gay-Bear-Manager-Mitch, now, Fired-for-Being-Gay Mitch on Bill Handel's popular morning radio show, but I missed it due to extreme bed-coziness; however, he and Devynn are featured on the front page.

In other news, Mitch's lawyer is starting the vast paperwork party it takes to serve suing-party papers to Homophobia High, aka Charter Oak High School of Covina, CA and Mitch is continuing to be the best water-polo-parent & money-raiser, hosting an inner-tube fundraiser recently.

NBC wanted him on the 11o'clock news, but Mitch didn't want to cry on-camera. "They can't have my tears!" he dramatically announced via phone. I pictured him raising his fist to the Pomona nightsky as he shouts, "I want to be on TV! I want to tell my story! But they can't have my tears!" Love it.

Meanwhile: 5 Linguistic & Visually Pleasing Words & Word-Combos

1. Kvetchup: a condiment for Heebs
2. Wussies from Worcester (must properly pronounce Worcester as Wooster)
3. Bored Boarders in the Whore Quarter (of the city)
4. Pork Wheels
5: Man Ham

Love The Ukulady

ps: 6. Trilogy: a name

Eco-Tips from The Unicorn Whisperer: Recyling Propane!

Dear Blob,
It's time for everyone to Recycle, Re-Use & Re-Believe in Unicorns.

Love The Ukulady

The Power of Grassroots Blobbing: Mitch's Story Everywhere!

PHOTO: The Ukulady's Pet: The Unicorndog!
Dear Blob,
Grassroots blobbing worked! You, blob, using your blobby tenticles, reached a real reporter for the Glendora Patch, who's story subsequently meeped Fired-For-Being-Gay Mitch's story out to the Gay Blobbing Galaxy and now Mitch and Devynn are featured on the front page of www.Advocate.com! If one googles Gay Coach Charter Oak, Mitch's story is everywhere!

This is not the way Mitch planned to get famous; he is a hilarious writer, storyteller & Entertainment Visionary. He is responsible for The Ukulady's early youtube fame, getting me a million hits and always has a brilliant showbiz scheme meeping around in his head.

I am relieved I'm no longer responsible for being the Interweb Voice of Mitch's story and somewhat shocked that the power of Grassroots Blobbing actually works. The more I read versions of Mitch's firing, the more ridiculous and outrageous it becomes. I hope the National Corndog Association gets aboard our Outrage-Train and sues Charter Oak for slander.

After I wrote the above sentence, I googled National Corndog Association and found no url, but did find National Corndog Day! Now I'm excited! And wondering if I should start The National Corndog Association... a non-profit dedicated to the advancement of Corndog Appreciation and Corndog Celebration.... Seeking Intern to Help Ukulady launch the National Corndog Association! Must be able to build HTML.

Love The Ukulady
ps: "Look at the Nipple!" I heard my pal say. He said Pitbull. Pitbull Nipple.

Fired-For-Being-Gay, Mitch's News Stories Hit the Stands!

Dear Blob,
Nothing like being emotionally attached to a media story to remember how slanted and biased the media is, depending on reporters & newspaper ownership. Here are 2 stories by real journalists about Fired-For-Being-Gay BFF, Mitch:

1. The San Gabriel Tribune

2. The Glendora Patch

The San Gabriel Tribune cropped Mitch's daughter, Devynn out of the photo and lays most blame on Mitch's firing for having gaycentric pictures. This is similar to telling a rape victim she's at fault for wearing a mini-skirt.

The entire reason we, Team Stein, feel Mitch has been discriminated against, is because the photos he had on Facebook were neither offensive nor inappropriate, unless you hate drag queens. The San Gabriel Tribue makes the pictures sound racy and outrageous, which they aren't. Boo to the San Gabriel Tribune; Ukulady gives you 3 stars out of 10.

And to make matters worse, they printed a terrible picture of Mitch; he is much cuter in real life. The photo-editors definitely know the way to piss of a gay man: print an unflattering photo of him.

Luckily the Glendora Patch's article is a much more accurate story and gets to the heart of the issue: How has this affected Devynn? And, ultimately, Mitch was a stellar water-polo coach and is an outstanding Dad and the Charter Oak Water Polo Team wants him back.

Kids model behavior. Mitch's firing because he hangs with Drag Queens and poses with corndogs is a green light for kids to rock out at the Hate Festival.

I'm currently reading a 1950's History of the World book, which is surprisingly, outstanding and a reminder that humans have not changed in the past several hundred thousand years. Humans have always been fearful, war-mongering bullies... until they get to know their targets. Then they fall in love. Same old story.

The Ukulady aims to be a Force of Change and continues to campaign for the Downfall of Evil!

Love The Ukulady

ps: Ted Haggarty is going on Celebrity Wife Swap! Poor man; he needs to meep it up with our drag queen friends.

pps: I'm a working girl for the next few weeks, pounding the pavement of LA, seeking camera-ready people with new cars for a market research project; I get business lunch!

ppps: I've inserted a Cute Picture of Mitch to counter the unflattering San Gabriel pic. He's adorable.

Celebrate Thumbs in Joshua Tree & Mitch Update!

Dear Blob,
Like firming a muscle with regular, focused attention, relationships & psyches require firming and nothing firms like a trip out of the city. Ukulad and I packed up our camping gear, costumes & Evil Sandwich and in 3 hours were surrounded by the Pink Rocks of Joshua Tree National Park. A million Thumbs Up!

Speaking of thumbs, I spent some Thumb Appreciation time recently, hiding my thumbs under my hands and using my acting background, super-concentrated on internalizing the sensation of being Thumbless, with only 4 working fingers. If I didn't have thumbs my pointer-finger would become superhero-muscley, ripped, as they say in the gyms, fitness & wrestling arenas of planet earth. I'm so glad I have thumbs; Celebrate Thumbs!

In other news, Open Mics & American Idol-like shows are the Modern Campfires of Today. Humans used to gather round the fire and weave song 'n' stories to entertain the tribe or do shadow puppets. Joshua Tree has primo Shadow-Puppet stages everywhere and our campsite was the scene of several alligator, bird & frog shadow-dramas. Joshua Tree rocks are like the Broadway stage for Shadow Puppets. We couldn't get past Short-form Shadow Puppets with the storyline of existence to mouth-opening-activities to death by being-eaten. Good times!

Love The Ukulady

ps: UPDATE ON FIRED-FOR-BEING-GAY-MITCH!
Fired-For-Being-Gay Mitch's story has finally been picked up by a real reporter for the Glendora Patch, a blog attached to the Huffington Post! The actual newspaper, a small Covina/Pomona rag, who was going to run the story decided to put off reporting the story until an actual lawsuit is filed, which could be weeks. We assume the newspaper is backed by Conservatives; why else would they put off reporting the News?

pps: I awoke this morning pleased I don't live in a town called Shrillsville. Shrillsville! A town for the shrill!

We Go Together!

Dear Blob,
I am a Valentine & Nature Enthusiast! This song was written in Barra De Navidad, Mexico and videoed in Joshua Tree, CA.

Love The Ukulady

10 Pleasing Word Combos: Day 4

Dear Blob,

1. Strippers eating Chicken Strips on the Strip.
2. Frenergy: Friend Energy!
3. Hobosexuals: Peeps who fancy Hobos.
4. Picky & Busy: Sisters
5. Pumice & Hummus: Sisters
6. Miss Fish, the misfit Fish.
7. Turtleneck! The Movie.
8. Manitard: leotard for men; Catchitard: netted leotard; Shellacitard: Glossy leotard.
9. Al Pacino Cheetos
10. The Fez Dispenser: Stocked with Shriner's headwear.

Love The Ukulady
ps: Detective Nibbles & The Wiglet: a Book

10 Pleasing Word Combos: Day 3

Dear Blob,
10 Pleasing Thoughts 'n' Word Combos:

1. The Trip-Trapping of the Von Trapp children...

2. Kim Jong Ill: When you are feeling sickly-despotic/manical; use: "I'm feeling really Kim Jon Ill! I Rule the Universe!"

3. Tidbit Quibble: "Stop Tidbit Quibbling! Todd gets the crumb, Velva gets the morsel!"

4. Flesh Vest & Flesh Cuffs: Kim Jong Il wore a Double-breasted Flesh Vest with Flesh Cuffs.

5. Pillogne: Pillowy Bologne

6. Muffin Man vs. Muscle Man

7. Ukuladian Geometry

8. Temps eating Tempeh in Tempe, Az.

9. Stage Parents vs. Stage Peanuts

10: Organic Ice: "This ice is organic...."

Love The Ukulady

ps: 10.5. Ricotta Frittata on Cibatta!

Update on Fired-For-Being-Gay-in-LA-County, Mitch Stein!

Dear Blob,
Finally gay BFF, Mitch Stein, Fired-For-Being-Gay, has given me the thumbs up to blob about the entire story so far, as I understand it:

As we know, Readers & Blob, Gay-Bear-BFF was fired from his water-polo-coaching job because of 3 photos found on his facebook page by an anonymous parent, who sent the them to the principal and superintendent of Charter Oak High School in Covina, CA.

Breaking News: Mitch is 99% sure that the Anonymous Parent is a former classmate of his who, incredibly, used to gay-bash him in high school!

Here's the Scoop:
Apparently another coach ordered several water-polo players to wash cars for a water-polo-related punishment. One of the car-washers was the son of the Gay-Bashing Anonymous Parent (apparently a Cop!); other carwashing water-polo-players have come forward to say that, upon seeing his kid washing cars, they overheard Gay-Bashing Anonymous Parent say: "I'm going get that F*****g F*gg*t!" Wow.

My breath is taken away with outrage, sadness and disgust. What is so scary to Gay-Bashing Cop-Dad about being Gay?

The good news is most of the water-polo parents are now wearing Team Stein tee-shirts and several other high schools have offered Mitch water-polo-coaching jobs. However, Mitch coached to spend time with his daughter, who by the way, is doing well and loves high school. Strong kid.

The school has yet to respond to Why Mitch Was Fired, but did send 3 certified letters downsizing the facebook photos from Obscene to Inappropriate. Watch out Corndog-Snacking People in Photographs!

Where is the press? Aside from my modest snack-centric blob, there will be an article coming out in a Pomona/Covina rag; but not until Mitch's lawsuit of is filed. Where is the LA Times? If this is how the press covers discrimination & homophobia, no wonder people still feel justified to smugly commit acts of Hate.

Where are the gay folks in the Covina? Why aren't they rallying? Why aren't they loud and angry that someone in their community has been fired for being gay? Sadly, we think that they are scared, afraid of being targets for hate crime. Mitch's firing is sending the gays of Covina and Pomona back into the closet. Makes me want to record an audio cassette of throw-up sounds and magically make it play on loop in the prinicipal's car, office & home.

Something is horribly wrong here. No one is blobbing about this; 1 small-time newspaper has picked up the story, but hasn't even published it yet! Where are the Gay Rights blob-bloggers? Please pick up this news! Don't let the kids of Covina learn from the celebration of hate perpetuated by the Charter Oak High School District.

Love The Ukulady

ps: I wonder how many gay bars the Gay-Bashing Anonymous Cop Parent secretly frequents? Give us a break, Gay-Basher! We know you want to be tagged in the Ukulady's Japanese Creme Collon Cookie picture

10 Pleasing Thoughts: Day 1

Dear Blob,
10 Pleasing Thoughts: Verbally or Visually

1. Minions with Bunions: The Egyptian slaves, hauling all those stone blocks....
2. Excellence Day
3. Fashion Model Fish
4. Spungry: Spunky & Hungry
5. Chartreuse: a girl's name
6. Ganhdi: I put the Fist in Pacifist!
7. She-Whistle vs. He-Whistle
8. Baby-Steps vs. Booby-Traps
9. Christ-Krispies: a Cereal for the Devout
10. Knee Caps: Hats for Knees

Love The Ukulady
ps: Squid Square

UkuAdventures: Resignation Mired in Capitalism!

Dear Blob,
1. Waiting Rooms are a Vortex of Hell. This week I was forced to watch Gluttony TV in a medical Waiting Room. The only redemption was the fact that I am not actually in a cinematic Far-Sideish Hell and I didn't have to stay there forever.

2. Gluttony TV: Man vs. Food the Television Show is an exceptional example of Humanity at its Worst. If I was an alien mother and my alien child wanted to take the spacecraft to cruise Planet Earth, I would show my alien child an episode of that television show in hopes of deterring his journey.

Yet, the gluttonous part of me enjoys the enormous melty-cheese-heavy foods consumed by the host and I'm interesting in visiting the Giant Food Eateries featured. However by the end of the show, when the host, sweating melted-cheese and MSG, stuffs the last of a 5 pound cheeseburger into his pie-hole, I'm repelled by the Celebration of Gluttony and disappointed, once again, in American Television's Promotion of Excess.

These are times, not of Unawareness of the Dark Side, of which Gluttony is part of, but Resignation mired in Capitalism. "Shrug, sigh, oh well, the '60's movement didn't work; there's a serious water problem, toxic-waste everywhere, politicians have learned nothing from the last 1000 years, human genes will either mutate & get with the program or die-off, so I may as well make some money so I can afford to live in a non-polluted part of planet earth....Mmmm, French Fries..."

When Greed & Narcissism, which seem ingrained in human genetics, are bred out of humans, my pretend Alien Mother will allow my pretend Alien child to visit Planet Earth.

Love The Ukulady

ps: My pal's psychic step-mother (take it in) says that when Planet Earth has catastrophic toxic events occur, like Fukushima, there is a rise in UFO sightenings because radiation affects ET's and the Universe... Time to Celebrate Life Today!