Californians Care for Britney!

Dear Blob,
Here are today's headlines in the LA Times California section; it's a grab-bag of important tidbits that are apparently, of importance to Californians:
-Police Dog Found Dead in Squad Car
-Nasa Employee 1 of 4 fire victims
-Britney Spears custody modifed
-Pot Operations targeted in raid
-2 girls hurt in shooting
-a couple more nibblets about sex abuse, Marine contempt and electricity rates.
Now while the news is often bleak and unfunny, I like to have a vague knowledge of topics that often make me feel better about my life. I wasn't hurt in a shooting, or a fire victim and I don't have dead dog in my car.

And in LA, it is equally important to know about drug raids as it is to know that Britney is Healing! A bit of good news relevant to all Californian citizens! Because we were worried. As soon as my Georgia-native manpanion moved to LA, he developed a concern for Britney Spear's well-being, as do my pregnant Lateen neighbors and the homeless junkie whores on skid row. Californians are concerned about Britney! Well, it's a brighter day for us Californians, because Britney and Kevin are modifying their custody arrangement! Upon reading this LA Times news, the relief that washes over me, makes up for the snub I received from Jenna Bush, in not being invited to her wedding. All is well! Congratulations Britney & Kevin!!!!!!!
Love The Ukulady
ps: my manpanion has invented Green Beans that taste like French Fries!
Recipe: Coat Green Beans in olive oil, sea salt and pepper and roast in oven at 450 for about 20 minutes. They are unbelievable!
pps: I hope Britney and Kevin start cooking together with their private chef!

UkuLady & Jefbot!

Brittney's new fragrance

Dear Blog,
I just went to Brittney's Official Website and she has a new fragrance in stores called In Control, and I'm sorry Blog, but I think In Control is the last thing that Brittney is. Not only is Brit not In Control, but the packaging for In Control resembles a pregnancy kit home tester or some sort of creepy feminine protection. Also, Brittney is still insisting that things are great between her and the repulsive KFed. Wake Up Brittney! That should be the name of her new frgrance! Or Get The Fuck Out Of My Mansion! That would be a good fragrance name. If KFed puts out a fragance, it should be called Wear A Fucking Condom! I mean, poor Brittney! She's not only fat, but she's going to have 2 really unattractive babies under 2 with the worst rapper in the world; and, poor Brit, Child Protective Services have alread visited the Mansion twice? Three times? Unfortunately her website didn't provide that information.
Speaking of the physical unattractiveness of Brittney's baby, I don't mean to be unkind. However, that child is truly pretty ugly. The strange thing is, he was part of People Magazine's Cutest Babies spread. Are they retarded? Perhaps. As People Mag is partially responsible for the iconography of ugly celebrities, such as Ashlee and Nicole Richie and barf, Nicky Hilton. Also, a quick query, have my myspace friendsies noticed that Paris Hilton is only photographed at angles? Seriously, she's never straight on. Also, there is some unbelievable Paris Hilton cameltoe pics available on the web. It's like she loves having her panties up her coot.
Yours, The UkuLady