Tuesday, November 29, 2011

The Wonders of La La Land!

Dear Blob,
After over a month of work-travel, also known as workel or traverk, I will be returning to LaLa-meep, the land of the Mosaic Tile House and other wonders, as sung about in this song:

Love The Ukulady
ps: New Muppet film = MEEEEEEEEP!

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

The Best Worst Song Ever!

Dear Blob,
Without a doubt, the Best Worst Song Ever, captured in video-montage, courtesy The Ukulad! Enjoy with your eyeballs and then take a listen a few times with your e-balls shut:

Love The Ukulady
ps: real-person work has taken all my energy and time...stay tuned for a flurry of blobbing in December...

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Fired-For-Being-Gay, BFF, Mitch Stein, Speaks Out!

Dear Blob,
Fired-For-Being-Gay BFF, Mitch Stein, speaks about homophobia, discrimination & honesty at Citrus Community College:

Love The Ukulady
ps: Sound quality gets much better about 30 seconds in....

Sunday, November 6, 2011

The Ukulady Business Traveler: Football Jerseys Dough Tubes

Dear Blob,
I'm, currently a business traveler, living in the Meepity Meep in San Meep, CA, for the next 3 weeks. My job: Fabulous-People Detective. I search for Fabulous San Meepians willing to be on-camera discussing their experience in car-commerce. Not necessarily Fabulous gay, but Fabulous, as in you definitely want to invite this person to your next dinner party. Hotel living is full of pros and cons.

The best part is my personal maid, Meepia, who cleans my room everyday. Worst is the medley of awful music piped into every public space; so while it's awesome to have a pool and hot tub, I have to contend with Easy Listening Light Rock.

The UnNamed Hotel is surprisingly busy, the lobby a hive of tourists & business travelers, easy to tell apart from their outfits; either enthusiastic San Meeep!/California! sweatshirts or conservative black suits with periwinkle shirts.

This weekend swarms of seeming-Mid-Western Sports Enthusiasts have taken over the hotel wearing Green Bay Packers garments and drinking heavily at the hotel bar.

The Sports Travelers of both genders favor the same outfit: a bulky football jersey. The lobby gathering of dozens of football-jersey-clad travelers has led to my new discovery: the football jersey is one of the most Unflattering items a woman can wear, particularly the midwesternly-plump female, who still stubbornly sports a semi-mullet/layered-mall-haircut. The footbal-jerseyed women, no matter how thin, look like pillowy dough-tubes and remind me of cheap pork-snacks served with light cheap beer.

Overheard on my way to the free lobby-coffee (by a pasty-sausagey-jersey-clad-mulleted gal): "I need Tylenol & water." Seems the party started when they landed in San Meep.

In other news, business traveling provides a generous per-diem, which has led to sampling more coffee-cake than I've eaten in the past 5 years. Stay tuned as The Ukulady disguises herself as a real person and convinces Fabulous San Meepians to give up their social security numbers in exchange for the potential of making money.

Love The Ukulady

Thursday, November 3, 2011

Halloween, National Sandwich Day & Mitch Speaks!

PHOTOS: The Ukulady's Halloween: The Ukulady & Stay Puft Marshmallow Man, Official Tea Party Member & Dead Prom Queen!

Dear Blob,
Working a real-person job is for the birds; many things are great, like paychecks, per diem and business lunches, but time for blobbing is challenging! Here's the hot scoop!

1. Fired-for-being-Gay, BFF, Mitch Stein, has his first speaking engagement at Citrus College! Yay! Read all about it!

2. Halloween is the best time of year because I blend in and really, everyone wants to play dress up. Halloween should be everyday. Airline travel on Halloween was particularly pleasing. I enjoyed eyeballing the flight attendant's costumes and spookily-decorated airline consuls. Halloween makes everything more fun and there's no family guilt, stress or materialism involved.

3. Today is National Sandwich Day! I enjoyed a panini in San Diego, where I am a business lady, working for the Meep, casting Real People in Market Research Video Projects.

4. San Diegoans are friendly, open and generally very camera-ready. Hot town; as in hot people and hot weather.

5. For our job we've picked sidekick code names; I've selected Assistant Beeker, Dr. Bunson Honeydew's sidekick and Advanced Meep Speaker.

Love The Ukulady