Dear Blob -
I physically splurted my coffee out upon reading the AP "news" headline: George Bush Forgives Kanye West. There are so many things wrong with this headline; I almost read the article, but realized there is no need; all I need to do is applaud George Bush & Taylor Swift for not letting Kanye West get them down! Now that they've forgiven Kanye, here is a to-do list for George Bush & Taylor Swift:
1. Get together in person or virtually and start an Official I Forgive Kanye club! You guys can charge fees for us peasants to join, and make even more money!
2. Start 2 separate I Forgive Kanye West clubs: One for the regular people (still charge fees) and then another for the Elite of Planet Earth; then you can have elite parties with better catering, cuter outfits and budget to hire Kanye to entertain at the club meetings! The peasants can have their own club and meet at Walmart.
3. Record an album together! George, you've owned a baseball team, started a war & lied to millions, what better career move than recording some duets with America's Sweetheart, Taylor Swift?! (also, you'll score cool-dad points with Jenna & Barbara)
4. Tour the world with the Forgive Kanye West album, book & heck, why not, reality TV show! You guys are gonna rake it in!
5. Pose for photo opps with Kanye, preferably in a rural third-world village, surrounded by rag-tag children.
6. Encourage Taylor to adopt a 3rd world baby and sign-on, with Laura, as the adoptive Grandparents & Kanye as uncle! You guys are going to be so popular!
7. Reach out to Kim Jong Il, Ahmadinejad and other dicatators of the world. Nothing brings the world together like the Power of Music; and particularly music based on mutual Forgiveness of Kanye West! You guys might win the Nobel Peace Prize!
8. George, maybe you could get a hair weave and be twins with Taylor! People love twins! Maybe you guys can even be triplets with Kanye! You guys could wear matching outfits! You'll totally bring the world together!
Maybe the aliens, that we know are out there, but refuse to visit planet earth because we are so un-evolved and stupid, will visit now! Forgiving Kanye West is not only going to bring the world together, but possibly The Universe!
Thanks for promoting Forgiveness, George & Taylor!
Love The Ukulady
ps: Lindsey is still in rehab.