Friday, February 24, 2012

BREAKING NEWS: Mitch Stein Files Discrimination Lawsuit!

CARTOON BEARS! By Will Guy of For My Bear-BFF, Mitch Stein!

Dear Blob,
Breaking News! Fired-For-Being-Gay BFF, Mitch Stein, filed his lawsuit against homophobic Charter Oak High School of LA County, today! Read all about it here!

While fighting a lawsuit is totally sucky, it's, unfortunately necessary in this ridiculous civilization we have been born into. Disappointingly, Humans have complicated every aspect of daily life by inventing dozens of ways to simplify daily life, which actually has unsimplified life.

The hot scoop from the plumply kissable lips of Mitch Stein is that he truly did not want to file a lawsuit. He wanted Unicorn Magic to happen (don't we all!). However, Charter Oak High School does not believe in either Unicorn Magic, Sit-Down Communication or Equal Rights for All.

The hypocrites (Christian Right) make me feel throat-barfy throwing around sentences like "We are protecting the Children" and other drivel. The question is Why is Mitch's daughter, Devynn, a second-class citizen? Why can't Devynn's dad be a coach like the straight parents of her pals?

Essentially the Christian Right is saying Gays and Lesbians are not Equal Human Beings. How can we be in 2012 and still have small-minded idiots running the world? How can any human with a brain actually believe in the old-bible God? Particularly a God who Hates the Peeps who throw the Best Parties, look the cutest and create almost-All of the Entertainment of Planet Earth?

Why are Bible-Thumpers so obsessed with what other adults are doing in the bedroom? I, personally, am obsessed with the Donner Party and Pioneers. This is a healthy obsession...making maple syrup from sap, covered wagons and cannibalism; Evangelical's obsession over cooters, booty and weiners is un-evolved. My advice to the Evangelicals is Get a New Obsession (not shopping). Try gardening! UFO research! Crafting Felt Owls out of used sweaters!

Go Mitch Stein and may we all Raise a Glass To The Downfall of Evil!

Love The Ukulady
ps: Aside from being lawsuit-filing upset, Mitch is also bummed about the unflattering photo chosen by the Glendora Patch. He does look...puffy, in the photo. Friendsies, since that fatty-photo moment, Mitch has lost over 40 pounds with exercise and eating well! Girl, you are Fierce! Bring it on!
pps: How awesome is the word Drivel? Love it!

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