Thursday, October 18, 2007

Manitards & Unicorn Cats

Dear Blob!
Here are some of The UkuLady's latest ideas and thoughts:
1. Candy Nachos - these would be very popular with children! Candy Nachos would be similar to Domino's Pizza Oreos Pizza, which got a terrible review in the LA Times. Candy Nachos would be banana chips with fudgey nacho sauce and studded with gummy bears, caramel nibblets and candy corn.
2. Portable Whistling Device - Whatever it is, it sounds awesome and I want one.
3. Manitard - unitards for men. Also Wussitards, for wusses and Shellacitards, which are shellac-ed unitards.
4. Unicorn Cats. Why are these not a common children's fantasy animal? I sense a future Ukulady children's song in the distance.... (I have a children's UkuLady show at Palm Spring's Pride and am having difficulty not writing about socio-political issues.)
5. Prep Shrimp - this is not a cooking instruction, but a clique of preppy shrimp at a shrimp high school. Prawns in collar alligator shirts, reminiscent of James Spader in Pretty in Pink.
6. Le Cool. A brand. Or a beverage.
7. Sex Quilt, The Band.
8. Turtleneck, The Movie.
9. Teen Kabobs, A Snack.
10. Ant Magic! A Game.
11. Cumin Human, a great rhyme. Or a seasoned dish for cannibals.
And finally, some advice from The UkuLady: You've got to Invite The Magic.
Love The UkuLady
ps: Britney is once again, redoing her website. Alas, the Get Well Britney Mailbox has been dismantled and encouraging global messages like, "Heal Britney!" Shep, Australia, are sadly, gone.
pps: You've got to be really fucked up to have custody of your children be given over to Kenvin Federline.

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