Sunday, July 24, 2011

UkuAdventures in Mexico: Hot Chips, Gas Station Banos & Spanglish!

PHOTOS: Cartoon Car, Exciting Waterfall Adventure Team, Unicorno, Jungle Mushroom!

Dear Blob,
So many fun things to report! The nightmare of the Pulgas is but a distant memory and Mexico is redeemed!

1. Fruita Exotica: There are tons of roadside fruit stands, primarily selling mangoes, coconuts, pineapple, yakal, which looks exactly like durian fruit and citrus. The Fruita Exotica vendors sell grapes imported from LA. Funny.

2. Hot Chips: I've discovered why Hot Chips, extremely popular here, are superior to Un-Hot Chips! A Chip-Enthusiast cannot eat as many Hot Chips as Un-Hot Chips, therefore minimizing pouch-expansion and leaving room for churros!

3. The legless & destitute hang out outside the bank in Melaque soliciting pesos; a better place for them would be the Airport, where departing passengers are more apt to unload their extra coinage before international travel. Get Thee to the Airport, Mexican Beggars! I'll definitely give them my leftover pesos as I'm leaving....

4. Spanglish: This is my new primary language. I would love to read a transcription of the past 5 weeks of my Spanglish, particularly the OC conversation. Most of my convos go like this:
UKULADY: Alejandro, Questa Subjecto Favorito en esquela?! (hopefully: What is your favorite school subject?) (or) La Cascada es el heffe! (hopefully: the waterfall is the boss; meaning, the waterfall is dangerous and in charge.). For the record, The Ukulady studied up to French 4 AP in high school (20 years ago), in hopes of singing French Art Songs and opera, a childhood passion.

5. Gas Station Banos: The Ukulady is a frequent road-tripper, traveling California's I5 from LA - the Bay Area and stops often for gas & restrooms, Loves being the stoppery of choice. Today, on our Exciting Waterfall Adventure (Blob Coming Soon!) with HB Larry, Laura & Alejandro, we stopped at a Pemex gas station with a Kiosko and I popped into the banos, where I automatically looked for the tissue-papery toilet-seat-sheets. Then I remembered I'm in Mexico and it's thrilling just to use a public restroom with a seat! In Southeast Asia most public toilets are holes in the ground with 2 feet-marks painted on the sides. I was glad I do yoga.

5 We heard a real Burro Hee-Hawing today! It was strangely exciting and oddly familiar even though it's the first time I can recall hearing an actual Burro Hee-Haw.

Love The Ukulady

ps: We've invented a new exercise called Truckercise! One executes Truckercise when one is riding in the back of a pickup truck; every time the truck goes over bumps or dips, the rider engages his/her muscles to remain a solid mass of muscle in the truckbed. It's a million-dollar market in Mexico & Alabama! Perhaps Georgia too?

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