Saturday, July 16, 2011

UkuAdventures in Mexico: Los Gatos Naranjas

Photos: Siamese Kitten Stray, Baby OC, HB Larry

Dear Blob,
Ridiculous developments on the Cat front! Here's the hot scoop: The other night at the Canuck's Meat 'n' Swim party, a woman came by on her ATV (popular transport in Mexico) with her daughter. She spoke no English and I trusted Canadian Rick spoke enough to translate she's been looking for her lost orange cat for 2 months. Sensing a glisten of hope to the Horrible OC problem, I Charade-Spanglishly explained that we have a gigantico papa naranja gato at our casa and maybe it is hers?

It seemed we understood each other. I understood she was looking for a baby, orange cat and a white mama cat. It seemed she understood we had a large, orange stray, perhaps her lost cat, now grown. She was desperate to come over, so I told her 10am.

At 1pm the following day, Thessica was busy resting with tropical pms, which is different than other pms (less cramps, more exhausted), when we heard a shrill, barky voice outside our gate and multiple ATV horn-honks. Totally unable to be social and accommodating, due to Tropical pms, Jessica hid under the table and I hid-nestled in the couch. We figured she was so desperate, she'd return to look for her cat at a more convenient time when we were feeling perkier and besides she was 3 hours late. We were pretty surprised she'd found Casa Azul in the first place.

The pushy and increasingly-pissy Lost-Cat-Seeking Lady stood outside banging on our gate and shouting for a good 10 minutes. Finally her shrieks subsided and we heard her ATV drive away. We emerged from hiding and embarked on an epic Crafting day, making cute change-purses out of tropical Mexican vinyl.

Amazingly, about an hour later a baby orange cat appeared in our yard! I was shocked. It fit the exact description of the Pushy-Cat Lady's lost cat! Neither of us had ever seen it before and it seemed we entered a Vortex of Mexican Psychic Cat EnergyMagic; we meet a woman with a lost cat; we haven't seen that cat, but a similar one; Pushy-Cat-Lady shows up to find her cat, we hide from her, an hour later her lost cat shows up! Unbelievable!

Certain the Pushy-Cat Lady would return to search for her cat, who I understood had been missing for 2 months, Jessica fed it, while Conchita looked on, seethingly livid. Pushy-Cat Lady did not re-appear. This morning baby OC has proved to be a gratingly-irritating bitch, constantly mewing, trying to climb the screen door & get inside the house. Where was her f***ing owner, seemingly desperate to re-locate her beloved pet?

Then Heroic Burbank Larry showed up to tend the garden. Still amazed by this incredible, weirdly-psychic lost-cat-showing-up story, I explained to HB Larry what had occurred.

HB Larry has been here 4 years; he has a fairly deep understanding of Mexican sociology and psychology. His explanation makes perfect sense and I am a schmuck. Pushy-Cat-Lady and I had a major misunderstanding. Clearly, she was looking for someone to adopt her cat and thought that person was me. She dropped off Baby OC and took off. It's ironic, considering I am extremely allergic to cats.

In the meantime, Conchita & Baby OC are having constant hissing-cranky fights on the porch, someonecat has been spraying disgusting, catty smell-scent around & there is a Siamese stray cat with 2 kittens living in the Magic Garden. Then Big OC showed up. It's like PartyCatProm around here.

The good news is HB Larry tells me has a history of Orange Cat Ownership, having nurtured Wilburs 1, 2, & 3. The bad news is Laura, his girlfriend, wants no pets. However, clearly Baby OC, aka, Wilbur 4, is meant to live with HB Larry. He's unconvinced, leaving Baby OC at Casa Azul, however, it's a matter of time before Wilbur 4 relocates to HB Larry's Casa Verde.

Love The Ukulady
ps: I blame Canadian Rick and his shoddy translating skills.
pps: Never trust a be-cocktailed Gringo's translating.
pps: Never get involved in a door-to-door situation unless it involved snacks.
ppps: I purchased fresh shrimp from a truck of shrimp fisherman, hawking around the neighborhood!

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