Friday, July 15, 2011

UkuAdventures in Mexio: RainWorms, Faceball & Tosdadas!

Dear Blob,
Heroic Burbank Larry to the rescue again! The odd, previously-described "rodent-like" creature emailed Larry to say, "I am not a rodent!" The animal, a White-Nosed Coati, also included a link to her origins! So interweb saavy!

In other news, we helped the Canuck's, Rick 'n' Cathy, celebrate their almost-final day in their gorgeous curvy-walled villa, by swimming in their pool, eating meat & learning about the Worms of Barra, who love to commit suicide in the pool when it rains. I took a turn at Worm Watch, which consists of speed-sweeping around the pool-perimeter in the rain as the super-fast 'n' abundant worms emerge from the ground and slither straight for the water. They are not North American worms, thick & pink, but supermodel thin, black 'n' red, string-like. They look like Shrimp Poop-Veins. The perfect opportunity to point out that you actually can be Too Thin, as in the old adage, You Can Never Be Too Thin or Too Rich: when you resemble a Shrimp Poop-Vein, you are too thin.

Rick 'n' Cathy were kind enough to tell us about AssWorms, a parasite which lays eggs in one's bottom. They've been coming to Mexico for 3 years and have never gotten them, but told us the locals take a de-worm pill twice a year. I'm not too worried, preferring fearlessness.

Rick'n' Cathy also taught us to play Faceball & Noodleball; Faceball consists of one swimmer covering her face and her swimming partner hitting a bouncy ball off the face/head area. If the Thrower doesn't catch the ball when it bounces off the Face, the Target becomes the ThrowCatcher. Noodleball's goal is for one person to catch the ball using a Swim-Noodle curved into a loopy teardrop-shape. The Thrower chucks the ball towards the Noodle, the Noodle-ee must minimize the Noodle-Loophole and capture the ball before it hurls into the water. Exciting times!

Meanwhile, Jessaly is becoming known in the Barrio, making friendsies everywhere! Taqueria Ramos's handmade-tortilla-making-lady invited me to join her at the tortilla station & make a tortilla from a doughball. Plump & be-aproned, she guided me to press the doughball in the tortilla-press, flap it onto the hot griddle and use my fingers to flip it, press down bubbles and flip again. Nothing is as delicious as a tender-hot, handmade tortilla.

Ruben, The Churro-Guy is totally our new BFF & Tony the Taxi-Guy spotting me awaiting a hot-fresh churro & joined me, schmoozing in Spanglish as the churro spiral sizzled in the hot oil.

I've discovered the Tostadaria, where fresh tostadas are made twice a day. It's refreshing to be immersed in a society where peeps shop & eat locally & seasonally and they aren't irritating yuppie-wealthy-Santa-Monica-yoga-Moms with collagen lips. In Mexico, the poorer you are, the more fresh, local & seasonal you eat. Only the wealthy can afford processed foods. It's the opposite of the US. In fact, I've seen very few overweight Mexicans, unlike LA, where most Latinos are overly-puffy.

The male-youth, virile, hormonal & super-fit of Barra De Navidad are obsessed with surfing and skimboarding. They are fearless, in the enormous waves until dark, which is around 10pm. I've yet to see a girl participate in the popular sport; girls generally get knocked up around 14, so they are probably too busy being pregnant and tending to kids to skimboard.

Love The Ukulady
ps: The longer I'm here, the more outraged I am at the American Media for generating a climate of Fear-of-Mexico. Most folks were very concerned upon hearing I was spending 5 weeks here. The American Media fails to mention that the drug-violence is in specific locations, not everywhere.
pps: America likes it's citizens fearful & sheep-like, sedated on soul-sucking television, twinkies & cheetos. Easier to manipulate.
pps: Readers, Jessica also has a blog!

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